Friday, June 24, 2005

Let me tell you a tale

Children, gather 'round your old Grandma Em and I'll tell you a story from my youth. In those days, Grandpa and I lived in Evansville. You've heard me speak of those times as "the dark years." Anyway, there came a time every year in late June (this was before the land was annexed to Canada) when a gathering called the Freedom Festival was held. Hydroplane boat races, acrobatic air shows and above all, children, lots of cheap beer and drunk rednecks.
Now, I know you are thinking, Grandma you crazy! But I actually lived where this happened and was done in the name of those who died protecting and serving our country.
Anyway, the main reason why this Festival disgusted me is that part of my "job" was to recruit volunteers to sell buttons to those wanting to attend. I thought it would be impossible to get people to stand outside in 95 degree heat and be around some of the most obnoxious drunk people ever for 4 hour stretches.
But people would fight each other and lie about signing up to volunteer, just so they could get the free gate passes. There was no reasoning with these people who would almost beg.
Now children, enough storytelling for today.

Monday, June 20, 2005

A different weekend

I'm back to the grind today, but the memories of this weekend are keeping me entertained. I went down to Chattanooga, TN (about a 4 hour drive if all goes well) for a Ratebeer gathering but mostly to see my bro. Er's living/working in Atlanta this summer and its hard to know when I'll see him next. Anyway, we drank a ton of good beer and he got to meet people named Iceman and Shag and CaptainCougar. I wish there was a picture of me getting thrown into the pool. I didn't bring any clothes to change into, so the next day's ride home was a little soggy. I'll see if I can find any pics to post.

Friday, June 17, 2005

What I've learned

in the past couple of days:
Yoplait Chocolate Mousse yogurt is pretty good, but for the calories you're better off going to TCBY.

In Australia, they call the people/company that move you to a new home,
"removalists." Much better than being called "moving men", don't you think?

It sucks when you are jealous of one of the best friends you have is moving to a better place. Especially when that place is called Cincinnati.

Lewis Black is a very funny man and I can't exactly explain why. Is he angry all the time?

There are keys that will unlock your car door but won't start the engine. AND these genius piece of metal are magnetic, so you can stick them to the hot undercarriage of your Saturn and never have to wait for the AAA man again.

We are where we are for a reason. The trick is being happy and content with the reason, the purpose, and the the length of time at that location.

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

The Most Boring Day

I was talking with Jo today and mentioned my boredom. A ranking system for boring days:

1. Inevitability
An activity you choose to be involved in (that turns out to be boring) ranks lower than a mandatory event that you are forced to do. Choosing to watch the J. at league bowling ranks lower than that time on my birthday when I was forced to see Garrison Keillor talk about nothing for several hours. Unwilling participation due to family circumstances ranks lower than the most forced of all duties - The Job.

2. Reactionary Activities
One time I made a jump rope out of rubber bands due to boredom. The more creative you are during the time of duress, the lower the rank. After all, if you have the resources and ability to be creative, the situation can't be that bad. Being old enough to drive decreased boredom. Graduating from college increased it. So did moving to Evansville. (No offense to family here. Its quite possible I'm still adjusting. Maybe.) Having access to the Internet is the median point.

3. Share-ers of Misery
Being bored by yourself. Being bored with a couple others. Being bored with a crowd.
The more people you're with, the lower the rank. Unless you are you are forced to just hear voices from the adjoining cubes. Like your boss saying "GIT 'ER DONE!" Annoying boredom is the worst.

4. Feelings
The last category is completely open to interpretation. For some, boredom leads to joy and relaxation. The experience of time passing one second at a time can be enjoyable, I suppose. I think the more natural feeling is frustration and eventually anger. If your situation leads to a flying rage (and you are a reasonably calm person), your boredom ranks high.

Only 15 minutes before I can leave for the day...