I really have a problem (it makes me uncomfortable) when people are hurting or upset and there is nothing I can do to ease the pain. Just "being there" is the hardest because I start to feel really itchy and nauseous. I believe that my feelings stem from not having a lot of experience dealing with situations where I can't say or do something optimistic to coax out a smile or laugh. My parents sheltered me from situations where I would have to face others' sorrow. Maybe because they feel uncomfortable in these situations as well. I'm not sure.
So today I will go to a visitation and tomorrow, a funeral. The second I've gone to and the first in over a decade. I will be supportive and try not to show anxiousness on my face. During and after, I'll be honest with myself and see if I can understand and change the way I feel and become more empathetic.